Questions on Hospitality

I have wanted to write some things on my blog for a long time now. I never had the inspiration for it – despite the many things which happened recently. The saying “old knives need to be sharpened always” is true in my case. I haven’t really lost the knack for writing – I just didn’t feel like writing. I don’t want to make excuses for my failure but, hey! Gimme a break!

However, a couple of days ago I had a rather weird conversation with an old friend --- whom I have not seen for a long, long time – and this woke/provoked/invoked the sleeping wannabe-writer in me.
The setting: Posh coffee shop, somewhere in Davao City
The time: 3 am

Let me give you a background about my friend. He was a classmate in the university. He was from another class, but when we reached 4th year, we went to the same hospital to do our internship. Friend was a quiet guy, very unassuming, and since he is from Mindanao, he seldom joins the Ilonggo group who are more boisterous and popular. Nevertheless, “friend D” was accepted and soon became a part of my other ‘beer-kadas’. We went to Cebu in the last year of the internship to take the now-defunct NMAT (National Medical Aptitude Test). I passed and he didn’t so that was the last time I saw him.

And so we forward to the recent times, when upon coming back home from a mission, another friend told me that he (the former friend D) is a now a big political guy in one of the towns in Mindanao! Pleasantly shocked, because I never saw Leadership potentials in him when we were in the university. He was always the timid guy sitting at the back row, bowing his head during class recitation.

So when I came to Davao last week, I sent some of my friends a text message, informing them that I will be in the city for three nights only (wow--- it’s like I’m doing a show, huh?). Willie (one of my closest friends), couldn’t come because his wife just delivered (congratulations – at long last – it is a boy!!!) and two others couldn’t come because of the strong rains in Kidapawan, Cotabato. So there I was with “friend D”. The first time I saw him was weird – because we didn’t know whether we’d shake hands or not (we were never huggers – even way back then). And after the usual how are you’s, he invited me to a resto where his wife was waiting.

We dined, and it was very nice for the wife was a pleasant conversationalist – befitted to be a politician’s wife. She knows how to say the proper words at the proper time. I learned that they have two beautiful girls and that they are trying to conceive once more. At 10:30 pm, Mrs. Soon-to-be-Mayor left.So me and friend D went out for a beer or two. Or three. Then it was 1:00 am.

He suggested we go to a brothel.

I stopped short and told him – “but your wife?”

No answer. I told him that I would rather stay in the hotel because I have to catch the 6 am flight.

He was persistent.

I didn’t expect him to offer to bring me to the “finest” prostitution den in Davao City. He may want to show his hospitality by offering me that’s why I was caught off guard.

When I was younger (read: uni days), I have had my share of “the good times” with classmates and friends – I admit. Some are memorable but most of those times were awkward and forgettable. I was young, naive, uncertain and lacked the self esteem most kids nowadays would have. Of course, I had the fear of catching a disease -- brought about by the endless hours of staining urethral and vaginal smears.

Anyways, he kind of resented the fact that I didn’t take on his offer. I told him that I am in a relationship and that being with someone else – much more a prostitute – would hurt both of us. I would be lying more if I said I didn’t want to --- it’s just that I guess I have reached this age where relationships matter more than a mere ejaculation.

He left feeling bad. I felt good about myself. I felt sorry for him. I could finally say that after all these years – after all the experimentations and the uncertainties – I have become mature.

And that makes me really proud.