First Midlife Attack

I have been in the humanitarian business for almost seven years now. Half of that was in this beautiful place in the Pacific, Vanuatu, about a year and a half in Africa (Malawi and Ethiopia), fifteen months in Myanmar and I now here in India.

I have slept in black cotton soil uder the pouring rain, waded through flood, saved 120 families in Bihar, operated on a hundred patients and, took thousands of photos, shook hands and did beso-beso with other expatriates and dranks a vat of alcohol.

I have been praised, discriminated, questioned, supported, urged, encouraged and enraged. I have witnessed, advocated, provoked, assisted, consulted, gave and guided.

Despite all these (the travels and experience), I never had a long-term relationship. I know it's a sob story. But it is just so difficult to maintain relationships when you are travelling around the world trying to save the dying and the desperate.

I remember a friend once said: "Don't think of yourself as salvador del mundo. At certain times you need someone to save you." We have had a huge discussion about it because I never saw myself as such. I try to maintain a balance between my sanity and my work and it has worked quite effectively.

Until a few weeks ago.

I just realized that I am getting old.

And I am not married yet. And in these times, I needed someone to save me.