I have recently met a lady from the states. She is in her 50's but she looked more than 70. Well, it didn't help that I opened the door for her at 1 a.m., but she indeed looked (help me out here, I'm trying to be diplomatic) -- famished. Must be the jet lag, I thought.
In the next few days I discovered that she eats only 4 crackers a day. Worst she had Giardiasis (a diarrheal disease caused by Giardia lamblia) and had to visit Mr. Loo several times a day. I thought it must be a divine joke being played on her.
Anyways, her weight made me realize one thing about me ever-so-enlarging abdomen. I have been on a beer and rice diet the past few months and I have gained some unsightly but extremely sexy curves. Heck, I even have man-boobs now!
So I devised a plan even Kate Moss woould be so jealous of.
1. Drink only whisky, vodka and Gin. Keep away from the beer. Only drink beer when they are super cold that a single gulp can quench your soul. If a single gulp is not enough, have another bottle just to satisfy your psyche.
2. Reduce rice. Except on days when the cooks would prepare pork.
3. Drink lots of water. Do this after you have taken several bottles of beer. This is also a good way to hydrate yourself.
4. Eat fruits in the morning. In places where fruit is difficult to procure, have a cup of left-over rice.
5. Avoid colas and other fattening drinks. My friend Ann Rexia said that Coke is the devil's way of making people fat.
There. That's my sure fire way of slimming down.
Oh yeah.. I specifically omitted exercise. I just don't do it. Lifting the beer bottle is enough exercise as it is for my fragile body.
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